In Praise of Folly

Erasmus of Rotterdam was a 16th century satirist whose attacks on clerical abuse laid some of the foundations for the Protestant Reformation. His best known work, In Praise of Folly, has never been out of print since its initial publication in 1509. And while that’s an impressive literary track record – and while I’m all for attacking clerical abuses where possible – I’m borrowing his title for an entirely different purpose.

To wit: The 2024 Chicago White Sox have just concluded a baseball season in which they lost a MLB-record-shattering 121 games. The full story is here. An excerpt is below. And Erasmus, I’m pretty sure, is rolling over in his grave.

 

How bad were the 2024 White Sox? Up in the press box, reporters traded terrible stats like kids trading scary stories around a campfire. Chicago started the year 3-22, and in a recent stretch of home games they went 1-28. They slumped through separate losing streaks of 21 games, 14 games, and 12 games. Over the course of the season, the White Sox have been outscored by more than 300 runs. After a while, the numbers feel less like statistics than like some sort of numerical insult comedy.

 

Best quote? The tweet from Kevin Brown accompanying this clip. “Oh my goodness. The White Sox have just gone full White Sox.”  At that point, the Boys from Chicago’s South Side were only on their way to losing game #109. Go figure.

 

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Believe me, as a casual follower of a home-town Rockies team who finished 33 games behind the first-place Dodgers in the NL West, I know from futility. Still, there’s something almost magical about a team this bad. And sometimes ya just gotta give a shout-out In Praise of Folly:  Go Rox. Go Sox. Go Erasmus of Rotterdam.

At least the ownership group in both the latter instances saved a little on player payroll this season compared with the Dodgers’ league-leading total of $352,849,147 – for comparison purposes, please note:

Rockies – $159,327,868

White Sox – $156,089,177

For those of you keeping score at home that’s 18th and 20th out of a total of 30 teams in the league. Any guesses on who #30 is? Here’s a hint: They only spent $80 mil on player salaries in 2024, and they’re moving to a new stadium soon….

Ah well, only 135 days or so until Spring Training. See the Countdown Clock, here. For the record? Erasmus and I can hardly wait.

 

In Praise of Folly. Go Sox.
The 2024 White Sox were historically bad. How bad? Worst team in MLB since the Protestant Reformation, bar none.

Golden Hour

The hour right before sunset is known to photographers as “The Golden Hour.” That seems about right to me.

 

Golden Hour.

Like I said: Golden Hour.

 

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The one way trek from the Alpine Visitor’s Center to Milner Pass is 4 miles and it’s all downhill. That makes it perfect for those who want an easy 90-minute hike. Forest Canyon Pass sits at the halfway point, both in terms of distance and elevation. Tree line is about 12,000′ so the terrain is all open alpine tundra above, and all mixed pine-spruce-fir forest below. As I’ve said before, this is my favorite hike in all the world.

A lovely couple who run a head shop in Arkansas – they were on a week’s sojourn to the Rockies – took our picture. And we took theirs. His white beard was very striking (think: Mr. Natural), but I had on my red Cardinal’s cap, so there’s that. All in all, I got in over 21k steps yesterday, and surprisingly I don’t feel too bad this morning. So…. I guess I better get out there and hit it again. Another month and this place will be under a deep blanket of snow, so time’s a-wastin’.

See on FB, here. AVW leafpeep pix on Insta are here.

Horsehoe Curve

The turnaround for today’s hike along the Highline Canal comes where it always does: At the horseshoe curve where a working ranch interrupts access to the trail for a mile or so before it resumes over by C-470. It was breakfast time when I got there this morning, as evidenced by the local residents enjoying their hay.

 

Horseshoe curve.
Horseshoe Curve. See it on Insta, here.

 

I actually don’t mind the interruption because it’s two miles in and therefore a good halfway point for a four-mile hike, which is about my usual.

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If I can convince my better half to take the 2-hour drive up to RMNP today, there may be more pix from the Continental Divide @MilnerPass. It is leaf peeping season, after all. Today is predicted to be another hot one down here on the flat lands. Yesterday we broke a record with a high temp over 90F. Today, likely the same.

Up there? It could be snowing for all I know. Dress in layers, that’s the ticket. In the meantime, you’ll have to settle for some pix of my favorite trail in all the world, taken a few years back, here.

Motorcycle Aficionado and More

Motorcycle aficionado.

Motorcycle aficionado.

Motorcycle Aficionado heaven near Devil's Head.
Devil’s Head.

 

The rock formation known as Devil’s Head is located on Rampart Range Road, 7 miles south of Hwy 67.

 

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The scantily clad motorcycle aficionado is just a figment of my imagination, though there are at least 50 miles of dirt bike trails on Rampart Range Road between Sedalia and Woodland Park. Here just past the autumnal equinox, this particular stretch is enticing, but it will become impassable and the gate will be closed once the snow flies. So probably best to get out there and kick up some dust before the weather turns colder. Word to the wise.

Whether or not you’re an ardent devotee of dirt bikes, or maybe you just like picking apples, there is much to love about autumn. See below for the NYer cartoon version of this lovely season, which – for my money – is the most wonderful time of the year, bar none.

 

Happy fall, y’all.

 

I love to pick apples, by which I mean that I insist on fondling every single Granny Smith apple in the grocery store, inspecting each for any impurity, before making my selection. The French do not approve of this behavior (they make you wear gloves!), but that’s probably why Paris is commonly, and disparagingly, referred to as the Little Apple, while we here in New York live in, and do the bidding of, the mysterious, powerful entity that is Big Apple. Do not betray him with Big Banana; he will know. But enough of that — you came here to laugh at jokes about the type of apple-picking that happens in the countryside, wherein city slickers and weekend warriors pay money to labor in the fields. Late-stage capitalism, you rascal, just when we think we’ve got you figured out, you goof us! For meta-goofs about hand-harvesting fruit as a hobby, please consult these cartoons.

—Emma Allen, NYer Cartoon Editor

 

“Well, he’s out for the season.”

 

“Here it is! No, that’s an apple again.”

 

“Maybe next time we can go mine our own salt?”

 

 

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If you missed it, see a previous apple-picking post, here.

More NYer apple cartoons are here.

 

 

 

Biblical Anti-hero

A follow-on to yesterday’s post about migrants, from my favorite heavily-tatooed foul-mouthed Lutheran clergy-person, and her website, The Corners. The title is “Election year wisdom from a biblical anti-hero,” AKA Jonah and his enemies. Enjoy. And I mean that sincerely, no matter who your enemies are. Even it it’s me. Especially if it’s me.

 

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The heated rhetoric in The U.S. right now, meaning the “they are all racists who hate women” and “they are all marxists who hate America” shit is cranked UP and I find it exhausting and I’m sick to death of how everything we read online (no matter your affiliation) is meant to make us feel righteous and make millions of other Americans look ridiculous.

But the reason I find it exhausting isn’t because I am so much more evolved than everyone who falls for it, it’s because I KEEP FALLING FOR IT. And while I am hesitantly hopeful for the first time in 8 years, and have my own strongly held beliefs about how I’d prefer for my country to move forward, I am also trying to be honest about what this is doing to my soul.

So here’s a short Bible story that helps me when I get caught up:

The detail most people remember about the story of Jonah is that he got swallowed by a whale, probably because this image lends itself to nursery wallpaper in a way that Jonah throwing a temper tantrum, or Jonah being a bigot does not. The whale part – that’s like, ok and everything…. but the rest of Jonah is amazing – I mean, you have to love a Bible story where the least interesting thing about it is that some guy gets swallowed by a big fish and is spat back up on dry land.

Background: The Assyrians were the enemy of Jonah’s people – they had ravaged and pillaged so much of Israel taking their wealth, occupying their land, and demanded that they be paid tribute – basically District 12 and the Capitol.

And then one day, The Word of the Lord comes to Jonah and God says “Go tell that wicked Assyrian city Nineveh to repent– those guys suck so much that their wickedness is like, totally stinking up heaven”.

It’s like if God came to me and said “Hey Nadia, you know the Jan 6th insurrectionists, and the people who worked to ensure that women in this country could no longer make their own healthcare decision, also all those mansplainers on twitter …well, you’re right, those people suck. So I’d like you to cry out against them for me.”

Can you imagine? I don’t know about you but I’d take God up on it in a heartbeat. A divinely sanctioned call out? I’d throw up some tweets and go on some podcasts about it and even show up in person with a bullhorn to cry out against my enemies, The Horrible People.

So it’s kind of weird that Jonah doesn’t take God up on this offer. Instead, Jonah takes off on a boat in the opposite direction. God says for him to go speak against his enemy – to tell them to repent – and Jonah takes off. Which is weird.

So here’s where he gets thrown off a boat, swallowed by a big fish and spat up on the shores of Nineveh where he finally speaks his little half-assed prophecy: “repent or be destroyed” but like, quietly and with about zero sincerity.

But the thing is, it worked! Jonah’s reluctant prophecy worked. His enemies repented. They stopped their violent ways, they dealt with their systemic racism and provided universal health care and separated their recycling.

And God did not destroy them!

But here’s the rub: Jonah, rather than being delighted that his enemies repented and changed their ways, pouts like a big fat baby. Sitting on a little hill outside Nineveh, Jonah finally admits why he was so reluctant to call for his enemy’s repentance: it wasn’t because of low self-esteem, home sickness or fear of public speaking. No.  When his enemies repent and are then spared, Jonah is like, Yeah, that’s why I didn’t want this stupid job in the first place – because I knew, God, that you were gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.

Yep. That’s a biiiig problem, a God like that. Why?  Because that kind of God is really hard to recruit onto our own team.

God was like, wait, you’re angry? And Jonah says hell yeah I’m angry (and here’s where he becomes a total drama queen) he says I would rather DIE than for my enemies to be spared.

I would rather die than for my enemies to do better and be shown mercy.

That’s what’s hard about reading Jonah: I have to look at how maybe I too need my enemies to stay my enemies, since it’s hard to know who I am if I don’t know who I’m against. And maybe I need for the apologies of those who have done wrong to never ever be “good enough” for me, because being the one who is right is a comfy place to be.  Not to mention that showing up with a bullhorn to cry out against someone else is a pretty effective way for me to avoid being the one being cried out against.

Reading Jonah, I am confronted by how uncomfortable it is to me that God loves even those who I think are WRONG, like seriously wrong.

Don’t mistake me. I haven’t budged on women’s rights and gun control and a number of other issues that make me other people’s “enemy”. I just want to have a modicum of humility – just barely enough to say that maybe God’s mercy is as much for me as it is for them. Because as impossible as this is for me to believe most days, I may be wrong about some things. And if I am, I’m going to need a God who is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, not a God who sides with me and smites my enemies.

I guess what I am saying is that my ego loves being “righteous,” but my soul can only rest in a God whose mercy is great enough for all.

 

Biblical anti-hero.
Jonah pouting on a hill just outside Ninevah.

My Home Town

From Pennlive.com, the online outlet for the Harrisburg Patriot News, comes this much needed antidote to hateful national rhetoric, direct to you from my home town of York Springs, PA. I last picked apples alongside migrants forty years ago, though this story’s as old as time, and it’s still as relevant as ever now. Maybe in no year in recent memory are the stakes higher than in this one, when brazen fabrications abound, spread by those who’d intend to hoodwink a gullible public. Don’t be fooled.

But you don’t have to listen just to me. Listen to Sarah Lott Zost, quoted in the article, and still fighting the good fight back in the fruit belt. Her uncle Doug played basketball with me in high school, and her dad Jim was probably a better baller than both of us put together. And you can quote me on that too, brother.

 

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YORK SPRINGS, PA — This tiny borough in the northeast corner of Adams County is enviably located smack dab amid a fertile valley ideal for cultivating apples, peaches and cherries.

For generations, white, followed by Black and then Hispanic migrant farmworkers have provided the backbone of the vast orchard industry in York Springs, contributing to Pennsylvania’s position as the fourth-highest apple-producing region in the country.

 

In more recent years, the workforce has been fueled by waves of Mexican migrant workers.

Many come and go with the seasons; others decide to stay, transforming what was once a predominantly white area. Latinos now make up half the population of York Springs, census data show.

Amid the contentious national rhetoric over immigration, York Springs offers a unique response to the ongoing — and baseless — portrayal by many Republican leaders from Donald Trump on down, that immigrants are ruining the country, bringing with them a surge in crime, gang violence, disease and are taxing local services.

 

The diverse population is reflected in the signs on Main Street: Lua’s Mexican store, El Rancho Mexican restaurant, Javi’s taco truck and Luz, Allegria y Esperanza Church, which tends to the spiritual life of many of the new residents.

But it’s the nuances of everyday life in the borough that attest to its dramatic transformation: The borough prints its notices in Spanish. The school district has fast-tracked bilingual services and ESL education to meet the demands of the surging Latino student population.

The Head Start program has gone full-tilt bilingual and several food banks and a clothing pantry help newcomers, the majority of whom live below the poverty line.

Local officials are puzzled by the angry rhetoric about immigrants.

“I understand that in some areas people see different things,”said Nina Tipler, a 31-year resident of York Springs and for the past six years its mayor. “We do not see that here. People want to come here and work hard and earn money and do what they have to do. They don’t bother anybody. They work, they shop, they feed themselves and move on.”

 

Tipler said the vitality of the region’s agricultural economy and its ability to meet its labor needs, rely heavily on the tide of workers from Mexico, and more recently, other parts of Latin America.

“I believe that all immigrants that come here legally are welcome and I hope that people understand that without these people coming into our country we would not be able to take care of the people born here,” Tipler said. “When I drive through the orchards, I don’t see people lined up to take jobs and work hard in the orchard all day, in the heat, the cold, the wind and the rain. Without these people, we would not have an economy.”

The Adams County fruit belt which comprises 120 fruit farms on 20,000 acres in York Springs and other communities, contributes about $580 million a year to the county’s economy.

One of the nation’s largest apple processors, Knouse Foods Cooperative, a five-minute drive from York Springs, sells the bounty of the region under popular brand names like Musselman’s, Lucky Leaf, and Speas Farm. The county generates $4.5 billion in gross domestic product and is home to a slew of food processing and manufacturing enterprises.

 

“If we did not have this reliable workforce, this all would be gone,” said Sarah Lott Zost, an apple grower whose family has been harvesting apples at Bonnie Brea Fruit Farms in York Springs for four generations.

“We would not be growing apples. A lot of people would have to switch to row crops or animal agriculture,” she said. “If you can’t pick your crop on time, you can’t have a farm. If people don’t show up to work, you can’t have a farm. We are fully dependent on their ability to come here and do the work.”

 

Zost said immigrant labor is critical not just for her 750-acre farm.

“I would say that’s true for the entire fruit industry here because we have really short seasonal work needs that are extremely difficult to fill locally, even though, we are offering what I would consider to be fair wages,” said Zost, a Michigan State University graduate who is the family enterprise’s business manager.

Those wages start at roughly $17 an hour, but the provisions for housing and transportation mandated under the federal H2A visa program, which is extended to seasonal agricultural workers, add to the wage value.

Every morning just after sunrise at this time of the year, caravans of vans and trucks transport hundreds of pickers from their homes in the borough to the orchards, where they work all day under the blazing sun.

Others head for the food processing plants; as well as the giant plant nursery, Quality Greenhouse, wholesale grower of annuals and perennials that provides much of the mid-Atlantic region’s independent garden centers and nurseries with plants and flowers.

Drive up and down the main stretch of Route 94 cutting through the borough, and you will see a profusion of color and foliage from the well-tended gardens and front porches that belong to the homes where most of their workers live. Quality provides the housing and the plants.

“Quality owns some of the properties and those are easy to pick out,” said Borough Secretary Catherine Jonet. “They are the ones with all the hanging flowers and potted plants. They are beautiful.”

Jonet said that in the 15 years she has worked for the borough, she has never met a problem caused by its Latino residents.

“They are great, what they have done for the community,” Jonet said. “They follow the rules and regulations and the law. They pay their taxes. They pay their bills. They are doing what they need to do to contribute to the community. I have no problem with them.”

Jonet quips that most of her difficult conversations usually involve the older — white — residents; and those are usually over the steep $75 citation that residents get if they don’t move their car off the street on street-cleaning day.

 

“It’s the whites that don’t pay,” Jonet quipped. “Latinos if they get a ticket they come in and pay, and they are nice. I have a lot of people yelling at me. It’s very cruel.”

The Latino residents — whether here for the season or newly established members of the community — have embraced York Springs.

Es muy tranquilo,” said Geraldo “Gerry” Sanchez, a Vera Cruz, Mexico native who has been picking apples at Bonnie Brea for 20 years.

“One must work. I have a wife and children in Florida. I have to work. This is a nice place.”

No machine can do the work that Sanchez and his fellow pickers do. The job requires dexterity and the ability to climb high up a narrow wooden ladder precariously propped against the tree to snap off each individual fruit from its branch.

The job attracts legions of immigrants, many from the avocado growing region of Mexico — the cultivation and harvest of that fruit resembling that of apples.

Sanchez said he tries not to pay much attention to the hostile rhetoric.

“You can’t generalize people. People are all the same no matter where they are from,” Sanchez said in his native Spanish. “But it’s a different world now. ”Times have changed. There’s everything in the world. All kinds of people. Good people. Bad people…but now you hear a lot about the bad stuff.”

 

Sergio Barragan, owner of Rancho Grande, the Mexican restaurant along Route 94, a popular destination for borough residents, echoes that sentiment.

“I live with a lot of gratitude,” said Barragan, a Mexico City native, who has lived in the U.S. for 50 years, most of it in New York and the last three years in York Springs.

 

“We Latinos come here with one intention — to work. To advance our families. There will always be bad people everywhere. But those bad people do not represent us.”

Although Barragan’s life was changed by his immigration experience, he agrees with some of the anti-immigration sentiment.

“I came here to work,” Barragan said. “To advance my family. But now you have some people coming through and they make us look bad. A lot of people coming in now want the government to take care of them. That’s not the majority of people in York Springs.”

More perplexing is the seemingly disjointed intersection between communities that need immigrants and those who rail against them.

Trump thrust Charleroi, an aging steel town in western Pennsylvania, into the national spotlight with scathing attacks on Haitian immigrants there — the same rhetoric he used against Springfield, Ohio.

Local officials in both communities have fought back against the torrent of unfounded criticism.

Charleroi Council President Kristin Hopkins-Calek said her community is “steeped in a rich history of immigration” and that the Haitian immigrants have contributed to a rise in population there for the first time in decades, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette reported.

 

Data show that immigrants commit proportionately lower rates of crime compared to native-born Americans.

Even those who represent predominantly agricultural regions have been hostile to immigrants. This past year, Sen. Doug Mastriano, R-Franklin County, introduced legislation to impose a 10% fee on out-of-country electronic fund transfers by undocumented immigrants.

“Illegal immigrants hurt Pennsylvania’s economy by sending money out of the United States and back to their country of origin,” said Mastriano.

Zost said her workforce is legal, each worker presenting documents required by law, including H2A visas; but she is uncomfortable portraying immigrants with broad brushstrokes.

“That is one of the reasons they are happy to do the work and work as many hours …it’s to send money home,” she said. “Everyone is paid over the table. They are paying income tax. They pay federal, and state and local taxes. They buy fuel. They pay fuel tax and buy clothes and food. I think they contribute to the economy in a great way. This feels like an unfair target on them.”

The Center for American Progress Action Fund, an independent, nonpartisan policy institute, has found that undocumented immigrants do not receive most federal benefits, including Social Security and Medicare. Rather, overall, immigrants contributions are a net gain to those entitlement programs.

 

Mastriano recently condemned a rumored plan to turn an old school campus in Franklin County into a facility for child refugees.

The immigrant minors, Mastriano said, would “spike crime, assaults, rapes,” and terrorize the community.

Tipler said that portrayal doesn’t reflect the real experience of communities like York Springs.

“The immigrants that come to my town are very low key,” she said. “They are coming here to do a job. Most people may not have their entire family with them. It may just be the men. They just want to do their job and make the money for their families and go back home.”

In Pennsylvania — especially the south-central region — where agriculture is big business, anti-immigrant sentiment is counter-productive, local stakeholders say.

“It’s surprising how so many people vote against their own economic interest,” said Susan Rose, Dickinson College emeritus professor of sociology and former director of its Mexican Mosaics, a research initiative that led longitudinal studies looking at the Mexican migration into Adams County.

“There is absolutely no question about it,” said Rose.“You talk to any farm owner and they will say that are absolutely dependent on migrant workers.”

 

Rose cited a slew of crime and law enforcement studies, including out of the Brenner Center for Justice, that show that new immigrants, largely Latinos, had proportionally lower crime rates compared to native-born people.

In the case of Adams County, she said, the center’s studies have shown that the vast majority of Latinos arriving in recent years are singularly focused.

“You have people working who are paying taxes who really want to stay under the radar for the most part,” Rose said. “They are not committing more crimes. That’s clear. Trump’s rhetoric on that is completely fabricated.”

Rose said immigrants in Adams County have revitalized food desert areas, established a newspaper and elevated the idea of bilingualism.

 

“I‘ve seen greater diversity in the community,” Rose said. “For me that’s exciting and it’s exciting for children in school where Spanish is more of a focus in terms of bilingual education. For me it’s a net plus in terms of looking at the community.”

Michael Holland, the senior pastor at Luz Allegria y Esperanza Church in York Springs, has a unique perspective on the tide of immigration that has changed the town.

Holland has heard heartbreaking accounts from his parishioners of their brush with extreme danger and hardship as they crossed the border. One Honduran mother in his church, he said, fled her hometown with her two daughters after the older one was repeatedly raped by gangs.

Border patrol denied entry to the older daughter because she was 18 and she had to return.

“That gives me compassion for the people I work with,” Holland said. ”When you hear these stories about suffering and extreme danger it makes me want to say how can we help you put your life back together. The majority of them are decent people that have gone through hardship in their homeland.”

Holland said that beneath the veneer of goodwill and co-existence, some of the immigrants have experienced discrimination in the area.

“It’s unfortunate how people who have come through such hardship end up being rejected or bullied or facing racism at Walmart,” he said. “They have come to a place thinking they are going to have security and safety and instead they are hated and rejected.”

Holland said critics of immigration must not be dismissed.

“We have to hear what their concerns are and address that concern,” he said. “I‘m the first to say I know that happens. There’s good and bad everywhere. …Everybody would be in agreement that we need to control the immigrant flow.”

In recent years, the Latino residents of York Springs have joined in the town’s Christmas tree lighting celebration, adding a unique flavor to the festivities. Residents have welcomed help from their new neighbors who offer to assist with garden work and home upkeep.

 

On any weekend, men assemble at the park to play soccer and even for that, Tipler said, they asked permission.

“We are very proud of our town,” Tipler said. “We are a very close-knit community. The biggest thing about our town is that all people that live here contribute in some way to seed and beautify our entire country.”

On a recent steamy afternoon, Zost joined some of her crews as they rushed to finish the day’s picking of Golden Delicious apples.

Years of working alongside the workers has helped her become fluent in Spanish — and a defender of the role of immigrants in her community.

“It’s not fair to people doing wonderful work in keeping our food supply secure and functioning,” Zost said. “There are people out here doing good work. We have dealt with ICE in the past being in the area. Nobody likes it. No matter who is in your workforce. It puts everyone on edge and creates a problem. We just want to be left alone to get the job done by great people doing great work”.

 

 

Howard Wolf in my home town, picking apples.
Then, regular as clockwork, we’d be back out there when the time was right for picking fruit in my home town.

Ig Nobel

This year’s Ig Nobel Prize winners have been  announced. “Ig Nobel” I hear you ask? Criteria for the prize and a list of all winners since 1991 is here. My favorite? The 2024 Demography prize goes to…  Saul Newman, for finding that supercentenarians and extreme age records tend to come from areas with no birth certificates, rampant clerical errors, pension fraud, and short life spans.

 

Ig Nobel - extreme aging.

 

The more you know….

Full story is here. Abstract is below.

 

Abstract

The observation of individuals attaining remarkable ages, and their concentration into geographic sub-regions or ‘blue zones’, has generated considerable scientific interest. Proposed drivers of remarkable longevity include high vegetable intake, strong social connections, and genetic markers. Here, we reveal new predictors of remarkable longevity and ‘supercentenarian’ status. In the United States, supercentenarian status is predicted by the absence of vital registration. The state-specific introduction of birth certificates is associated with a 69-82% fall in the number of supercentenarian records. In Italy, England, and France, which have more uniform vital registration, remarkable longevity is instead predicted by poverty, low per capita incomes, shorter life expectancy, higher crime rates, worse health, higher deprivation, fewer 90+ year olds, and residence in remote, overseas, and colonial territories. In England and France, higher old-age poverty rates alone predict more than half of the regional variation in attaining a remarkable age. Only 18% of ‘exhaustively’ validated supercentenarians have a birth certificate, falling to zero percent in the USA, and supercentenarian birthdates are concentrated on days divisible by five: a pattern indicative of widespread fraud and error. Finally, the designated ‘blue zones’ of Sardinia, Okinawa, and Ikaria corresponded to regions with low incomes, low literacy, high crime rate and short life expectancy relative to their national average. As such, relative poverty and short lifespan constitute unexpected predictors of centenarian and supercentenarian status and support a primary role of fraud and error in generating remarkable human age records.

Nutcase Survivalist Wannabe

What picture comes to mind when you hear the words “nutcase survivalist wannabe?” Christopher McCandless of “Into The Wild” fame? Theodore Kaczinsky, AKA “The Unabomber?” Or how about the guy crouching with an AK for 12 hours in the woods outside a West Palm Beach golf course waiting for POTUS 45 to play through?

For my money, it’s none of the above. Rather, it’s Henry David Thoreau. Remember him? The guy who wrote “Walden” while living in a cabin on property owned by his friend Ralph Waldo Emerson. A cabin that was situated less than two miles away from Thoreau’s boyhood home in Concord, MA. That’s where his mother still did his laundry while he was writing his manifesto of living the simple life. Yeah, you heard me: A mama’s boy, through and through.

 

The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation. From the desperate city you go into the desperate country, and have to console yourself with the bravery of minks and muskrats.

 

At least Chris McCandless died pursuing his survivalist’s dream in an abandoned school bus in remotest Alaska. Ted Kaczinsky, who spent 25 years in a southern Colorado Supermax after his 17-year bombing spree conducted from a remote Montana cabin, finally died in prison last year. The guy with the AK near the sixth hole in West Palm Beach? We’ll see. But my guess? He probably does his own laundry.

The true measure of a nutcase survivalist wannabe is not how remote or how rustic the digs. It’s how divorced from everyday circumstance the rhetoric. In that contest, Henry David Thoreau wins by a country mile. And you can quote me on that too, Pardner. Brave minks and muskrats? HA!

 

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Nutcase survivalist wannabe - Thoreau
Henry David Thoreau’s cabin: How do we know it? There’s no laundry drying on the line.
Kaczinsky’s digs: Even more spartan than a Supermax prison.

 

Chris McCandless’ Magic Bus. The full story is here.

 

Alaska officials removed Chris McCandless’s school bus in 2020 because it had become become a lure for dangerous and sometimes deadly pilgrimages into treacherous backcountry.

The same cannot be said for Thoreau’s cabin on Walden Pond. Don’t be fooled by flowery words. There’s “quiet desperation,” and then there’s… well, you know: Like I said, “Mama’s boy.” But don’t listen to me. You can read the full story, here.

Today’s PSAs

Today’s PSAs are brought to you by whoever made them up.

Me, I don’t create ’em, I just report ’em.

Yer welcome.

 

Winter is coming soon.
Heinz is so tired of restaurants refilling their bottles with non-Heinz ketchup that they developed a label sticker where the outer border matches the exact colour of genuine Heinz ketchup. If it matches, it’s the real deal. If it doesn’t, it’s condiment fraud.

 

Todays PSAs - 3XL slim fit.
Wait, WHAT? 3XL SLIM FIT?
Todays PSAs - cancer screening
You know it’s time for a screening when….

 

 

Todays PSAs - good day 2 B bald.
Words to live by.

The corn maze PSA is my fave.

 

Our Local Ranchers

You just gotta love our local ranchers.

Love our local ranchers.
I always assume somebody’s waiting over the crest of that hill.

 

Yesterday’s hike was a straight shot down to the end of Douglas County Rte. 5 (a dirt road) where it dead ends south of Roxborough Park before giving way to horse farms pretty much all the way to Palmer Lake. I hadn’t gone this way for the better part of a year. Yesterday I only saw a couple of mule deer, no other life forms human or otherwise. But I always look forward to seeing this sign put up by local ranchers at my turn-around point – God love ’em. Though the lettering has faded somewhat thru the years, the sentiment remains crystal clear.