November 2019 - DEW Consulting

November 30, 2019February 23, 2020

Spammer

I got the following comment from a spammer recently:

Bianca Andreescu latest info
0 approved
techband.me/question_app/node/4331 x
[email protected]
45.12.223.183

Hello, i read your blog occasionally and i own a similar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam remarks? If so how do you stop it, any plugin or anything you can recommend?

I get so much lately it’s driving me mad so any support is very much appreciated.

This one caught my eye for a couple of reasons. First, I hate spam. And I had recently asked my webmaster (thanks, Ben!) the same question. So, he tinkered with the settings on the Akismet package we use for security and filtering here at dewconsulting.net and we decided to set it to completely reject – rather than merely segregate – obvious spam. And, voila! The volume of stuff landing in my spam folder dropped from about a-dozen-a-day down to one-or-two-a-week. Great, I thought! Now I won’t have to delete that 14-page bible-verse screed that regularly comes from Gog-of-Magog, you know, the one warning me to assiduously avoid 666-Mark-of-the-Beast. Or, the one from Hairstyles – “short-long-medium… we do it all!” – that doesn’t realize I don’t have any hair to style. But somehow this particular piece of probable-spam sneaked past whatever algorithm Askimet uses to figure out what’s clearly garbage and what’s commentary gold. Interesting. Note to self: Whenever sending spam in future, ask spammee to help figure out how to avoid spam. Genius!

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In any case, here’s a seasonal holiday blessing from me – your intrepid blogger – to all my faithful bloggees: May your days be 100% spam-free. But, if any spam does slip through, may it be creative enough to make you shake your head in wonder at the fact that someone has gone to that much trouble just to post a comment.

Oh, and “Bianca,” in case you’re really reading this. The final answer is:

“Akismet.”

November 29, 2019November 29, 2019

Opt Outside

I have posted before on my disdain for the commercial excess that is Black Friday. If you care to read all about it from last year, that can be found here. But this time around, opting for less snark, I’m giving a hearty shout out to a group called Walk2Connect. They promote healthy lifestyles through group hikes that also foster social interaction. Their event for this day after Thanksgiving – usually given over to shopping and recovery from yesterday’s caloric excess – is called “Opt Outside Friday.” The following visual aid came to my inbox this morning, complete with a message that’s good any and every day, all year long:

And with that… let’s go take a hike!

Walk on, friends.

November 28, 2019November 28, 2019

Chillaxing

I had to go to the Urban Dictionary for today’s WOTD. But there it was nevertheless. “Chillaxing: a state of ultimate chill and relaxation.”

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It is literally chilly in Sacramento today – also soggy. I am camped out with Ben here at 392 Midstream for the Thanksgiving weekend. Accuweather says “43” and I can believe it. I walked to not one but two convenience stores this morning. Both places are run by Sikhs in turbans. Neither of them had the half-and-half I craved for my morning coffee. Turns out, much as I hate to admit it, I broke down and hustled over to Westside Identity Coffees for a $4 cup of their inferior brew. Ah well. Into every life a little rain must fall.

Speaking of rain, we just had our first big one of the season here. I knocked off work at noon in L.A. yesterday and drove up I-5. At 6 hours it was my quickest trip ever through the Central Valley. With everyone-and-their-brother fleeing town, forecasters were calling for fresh snow on the Tejon Pass and traffic Armageddon on the roads. But temps stayed in the 40’s. All the sky managed to do was an intermittent spritz. There was a bad accident near Stockton that slowed things down. But by that point the treacherous terrain of the Coast Range was far behind, way back on the butt end of the Valley by Bakersfield. So I drove on largely unperturbed in my 20-year-old Chrysler 300 (thanks, Denny!) chillaxing to strains of Sheryl Crow and the Allman Brothers Band. I know – totally old school – right? Ah well – I yam what I yam.

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Speaking of resigned to fate, the WAVE cable guys are coming tomorrow to hook up a TV box. So from now on Airbnb guests won’t have THAT to complain about any more. Actually, joke’s on them, ’cause I raised prices to cover the subscription cost. Now they’ll pay more, but all they’ll have to show for it is 114-channels-worth of nuthin’-worth-watching. <HA! TAKE THAT!> Actually this place is booked solid through the 1st of March, so if yer planning to visit, better make a reservation quick. Otherwise you’ll end up out in the rain with the rest of Sacramento’s homeless population. But don’t get me started on THAT sad story.

At the opposite end of the socioeconomic spectrum, we’re booked this afternoon for dinner at the Sutter Club with the in-laws (thanks, Denny!). I can say from experience that the head chef there is without peer. Whether it’s Easter, Thanksgiving, or just a random Friday in February, you won’t go away hungry. Still, we’ve also got our own turkey thawing in the sink, and all the ingredients for green bean casserole ready to roll. Maybe tomorrow? After a nice long levee walk? Hey, there are worse fates.

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I think I saw the sun just peek its nose out. Imagine that. Sunshine in Cali. Whodathunkit? Must be time for a levee walk. Beats watching TV.

Chillaxing with the TV at the Airbnb — Chillaxing now comes with cable TV at the 392 Midstream Airbnb. (Thanks, Denny!)

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

November 25, 2019December 21, 2019

Gratitude Challenge

The 5-Day Gratitude Challenge from the TED talk people – see here for details – is probably more touchy-feely than most readers of this blog can stomach. Some of these things I can’t imagine doing myself, or asking others to do. The one (#4) about writing a eulogy for a person still living, then handing it to them? That one’s kinda creepy – but also kinda cool – in a macabre sort of way. All I can say is, you better pick the right person to try this one on, otherwise they might get the wrong idea and figure you’ve put a hit out on them. In the days leading up to Thanksgiving, this is a nice break from all the turkey-and-football related stuff that’s ordinary blog-fare this time of year. As for #2 – “Look your barista in the eye and say thanks when they serve you yer coffee” – that one’s easy enough. Especially when Starbucks gives you free coffee on your birthday. For me, that’s tomorrow. And as for #1 – “Post a picture of something you’re especially thankful for” – that one’s easy too. Waddayathink? Am I right?

My better half – here in the Cali sunshine – both of which I’m eternally grateful for.

You got anything you’re grateful for?

C’mon, play along… and don’t forget to tip yer barista!

Gratitude Challenge Bonus Content: Poetry Corner

Gratitude List
by Laura Foley

Praise be this morning, for sleeping late,
the sandy sheets, the ocean air,
the midnight storm that blew its waters in.
Praise be the morning swim, mid-tide,
the clear sands underneath our feet,
the dogs who leap into the waves,
their fur, sticky with salt,
the ball we throw again and again.
Praise be the green tea with honey,
the bread we dip in finest olive oil,
the eggs we fry. Praise be the reeds,
gold and pink in the summer light,
the sand between our toes,
our swimsuits, flapping in the breeze.

November 24, 2019November 24, 2019

Oyster-wife

From its beginnings during the time of the Roman occupation, the Billingsgate fish market in London has been notorious for the crude language that has resounded through its stalls. In fact, the fish merchants of Billingsgate were so famous for their swearing centuries ago that their feats of vulgar language were recorded in Raphael Holinshed’s 1577 account of King Leir (which was probably William Shakespeare’s source for King Lear). In Holinshed’s volume, a messenger’s language is said to be “as bad a tongue … as any oyster-wife at Billingsgate hath.” By the middle of the 17th century, billingsgate had become a byword for foul language.

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It’s been a while since there was a Word of the Day sufficiently salty to hold my interest. But today’s offering, “billingsgate,” fits the bill.

Now, about that “oyster-wife”…

You make the call!

November 20, 2019November 21, 2019

Do well by doing good

When visitors come to visit us in Colorado, we often take them on the Breckenridge Brewery tour. Because it’s close, because it’s cheap, and, well… beer! Back in 2015, Breckenridge sold out to InBev, which also owns Anheuser-Busch, the maker of Budweiser. At the time, Breckenridge’s tour guides were quick to point out that, although they were now part of a big international conglomerate, they would remain a “craft” brewery – at least under the narrow definition of “craft” in terms of yearly production. Now comes the news (see here in today’s DP) that Ft. Collins-based New Belgium Brewery (the maker of “Fat Tire”) is joining the corporate ranks as a division of Australian-based Lion Little World Beverages, itself an arm of Japan’s spirits behemoth, Kirin Holdings. In the DP article, New Belgium founder Kim Jordan (trained as a social worker and raised as a Quaker) emphasized the benefit of the sale to the retirement accounts of New Belgium’s employee owners. I got no problem with “Do well by doing good.” But, far as I’m concerned, it’s all about the beer. So, brew on, bro’s. And don’t cut corners on the hops. Do that much and I don’t really care who owns it. And you can quote me on that too.

November 19, 2019December 24, 2019

Je suis le pain de vie

As my Marseilles-bound better half gets set to jet across the pond later this week, there comes this NY Times story. It’s about the imminent demise of French bakeries. No more fresh baked bread in France? <Je suis le pain de vie!> Just for the record, there is an excellent patisserie called “Pascal” that is actually less than the French average 7.4 minute walk from my L.A. apartment. So take THAT, ya dang French slackers!

French mime, Marcel Marceau

What? Say it ain’t so, Marcel Marceau!

November 17, 2019November 17, 2019

Shout Out

Big shout out to both my brothers-in-law, Axel and Don, each with a big media splash recently. First, there’s this story in the November issue of County Lines Magazine just in time for the Thanksgiving rush.

You may have seen him around … he’s the guy at farmers’ market with the shirt that says “Turkey Whisperer.” That’s Axel Linde, informally known as the King of Puns. He’s the owner and operator of Lindenhof Farm in southeastern Lancaster County.

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And Don scores a cameo role in the video accompanying this Runner’s World piece about trail running with Sherman the rescue donkey.

Shout out - Don K. — Both bald, but only one is a (minor) celebrity… and it sure ain’t me.

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Wow!

Grazing gobblers and distance-running donkeys?

Now that’s really something to shout about.

Way to go, guys!

November 16, 2019November 16, 2019

Shoefie

The lead of our DXC (formerly HPE, formerly CSC, formerly EDS) offshore development team was in town this week. Sathish is from Chennai which is in the Tamil region in the far south of India. He wanted a selfie of us to take back home with him – after he makes a detour to Vegas this weekend. I told him I’d be happy to oblige, though what _I_ wanted was a “shoefie” of us – because I thought his were so stylish. I’ll let you guess which is which…

November 15, 2019November 15, 2019

Real Life

I have shared my love of real life mysteries before – see here. Now there’s this one, from Wired magazine, called “The Strange Life and Mysterious Death of a Virtuoso Coder.” This stuff really appeals to me. Why? Not because it features extreme techies who code for fun and profit, as I do. Nor because it is set near Columbus, OH, where I have relatives living. And not even because it involves opioid addiction, intrigue, and forensic evidence of possible foul play… well, never mind about all that. Read the full Wired piece, here. Then, watch yer back, ’cause you just never know. Y’know? But if you ever figure out that missing blockchain code, please notify me immediately. It could be worth millions. ‘Nuf said.

Real Life Gas Station

In 2018, Jerold Haas vanished from this Clinton County, Ohio, gas station while a friend was buying snacks. His body – complete with fractured femur – was discovered months later by a hunter in a nearby soybean field. What happened? Some say murder. Others say something else….